Most of us are pretty sharp when it comes to noticing other people's imperfections and faults, but what about our own?

You know, some folks have the mistaken idea that people with high self-esteem think that they are perfect. But the truth is that high self-esteem people are always looking for ways they can improve.

It is people whose self-esteem is shaky who are threatened by looking at their imperfections and weaknesses. They don't want to know about their problems, because then they may have to actually do something about them and, unfortunately, they don't feel very effective when it… >>>

Just about everyone knows that good role models are important for a child's development, but have you ever thought about why this is true? 

If you are familiar with my work, you know that it emphasizes visualization, because we have learned that our mental images, for the most part, are what determine our reality.  In other words, the way we see ourselves and the world is what decides how we will behave, and how we behave determines, to a very great extent, what will happen to us.

Role models serve as living, breathing mental images that help us visualize the… >>>

Everyone has a self-image, but how does a self-image get built? And what does your self-image have to do with who you are, and how you react in strange or unusual situations?

Your self-image, or your idea of who you are, is a package you put together from how others have seen and treated you, and from your conclusions as you compare yourself to others. Primitive people built homes from available materials - blocks of ice, animal skins, adobe, and logs. In this same way, when you were a child, you built your self-image from what was available.

Your construction… >>>

Today, let's talk about an interesting fact that piano teachers have always known.

Most people are familiar with the phrase, "use it or lose it," which is usually said about muscle power. But scientists who are studying how the brain works have made some discoveries indicating that this saying holds true for our mental capacities as well.

Also, they have discovered something about mastering difficult tasks that is very interesting.  They have found that the better you get at doing something difficult, the less brainpower it takes.

Now, in some ways this seems to contradict common sense. For instance, if… >>>

How do you create an organization that inspires people to do their flat-out best?  Today, I'll give you a few quick tips.

For over 40 years, I've been in the business of helping people and organizations use more of their potential.  Based on my experience, and on the latest research in cognitive and organizational psychology, here, in a nutshell, is how to create an organization that inspires people to do their best.

First, you need an inspiring goal, a common vision of a clearly-defined end result, shared by everyone, talked about often and affirmed daily.  Then, you need people who… >>>

Why do we go to college? Is it just to get a better job and earn more money, or is there some other purpose?

The U. S. Department of Labor published a report that stated what some of us already knew: a lot of college graduates are having trouble finding suitable jobs. In the current economically-challenged technology companies, they are letting employees go - not hiring. A career consultant in my home state says that for every job that pays in the 30 to 35 thousand dollar range, it is not uncommon to get 200 resumes.

In my own company,… >>>

Parents, if your kids had a class called "Honesty 101," would they cheat to get a passing grade? Do kids today think of cheating as something everybody does, except nerds? Do they see it as a victimless crime that involves little risk and certain gain?

According to surveys of students and teachers across the U.S. and abroad, the answer is, unfortunately, yes.  Fred Schab, professor emeritus at the University of Georgia, says that since 1969 when he began his study, cheating has been on the rise

More kids think dishonesty is sometimes necessary and more parents are helping their kids… >>>

If you are single and looking for a long-term relationship or marriage but are having trouble finding a partner or spouse, I have some suggestions for you - and they don't involve an Internet site.

First, do you know specifically what kind of person you are looking for? What qualities do you value in a mate, and how do you judge whether a person has those qualities?   

Do you have a clear picture of what your relationship with your partner will be like, including how you will treat each other, how you will deal with conflict, how your social life… >>>

How does it make you feel when someone asks how you are, but obviously couldn't care less about your answer? How do you feel when someone, who says they care about you, belittles your efforts or puts you down?  

If you are like most people, things like this hurt your feelings. But did you know that if it happens enough, it could also damage your self-esteem? It's true. It is hard to maintain a high opinion of yourself when those who are closest to you are always trying to pull it down. Of course, the reason they do so in… >>>

Have you ever heard of the "if only" syndrome? Some people think of "if only" as "Worry, Part 2." Today, I'll tell you what it is and how to avoid it. 

Do you know anyone with the "if only" syndrome? Maybe you have a touch of it yourself. People with this syndrome blame others for their disappointments and failures. They blame their families ("Nobody could succeed with the parents I have"); their friends ("If only my so-called friends would come through for me once in a while"); their circumstances ("It's obvious that the deck is stacked against me"); and their… >>>

What is the difference between mediocrity and greatness? Possibly not as much as you think.

You know, it really takes very little to make a big difference in our lives and in the world. In professional baseball for example, most batters hit for an average of about .250, which means that they get one hit for every four times at bat.  Anyone who hits .300, three hits out of ten, is considered a star.  By the end of the season, there are only about a dozen players out of hundreds in the leagues who have maintained a .300 average, and… >>>

Most of us worry a bit from time to time, and there are probably a lot of us worrying about our finances these days. But you know, too much worry is a dangerous thing. You see, our awareness of the future is an important part of our search for meaning and purpose in life. However, when awareness of the future becomes dominated by uneasiness, restlessness, fear and worry take over.  

One of the staples on my bookshelf is by J. Ruth Gendler, "A Book of Qualities," and she makes worry into a person who seems very real:  

"Worry etches lines… >>>

How tolerant are you of people who look and think differently than you? With global terrorism continuing to rise, this is an important question - one which drives down to the very core of who we are as human beings.

I am deeply concerned about hate crimes (meaning crimes motivated by racism, intolerance or bigotry) today. It's also very troubling that people under the age of 18 commit more than half of these vicious crimes in the United States - and the trend seems to be spreading to other countries not normally known for such behavior.

A Harris Poll some… >>>

Do you know what Scotomas are? Everyone has them and they can keep you from seeing the opportunities all around you.

So what exactly is a "Scotoma?" It's what doctors call the defect that blocks sight in one part of our visual field. It's also a term I use to describe our occasional failure to see what's right in front of us because we build our own Scotoma, or mental blind spot, to it.

You see for the most part, we see what we expect to see or what we look for, not what is really there. What we expect… >>>

How do we build a better society, a better world? Today, I will give you my prescription for a better world.

I get e-mails nearly every day, and some come with special requests. A while back, one such person wrote, "I've been reading your words lately as you talk about raising kids and dealing with conflict and adversity, and the importance of self-respect and self-esteem. Now, would you please talk about how we can build a better world?"

I'd be glad to. In fact, I have been all along. Because, you know, if we want a world with more intelligence,… >>>

What do you say to a friend who has had a death in the family? I suppose this may seem an odd choice for a daily e-mail message, but it is something that affects us all at one time or another. As I write this, I feel confident that many of you reading this have recently dealt with this very situation.

Many people feel bewildered when it comes to the etiquette of death. Because they don't know what to say or do, they don't do anything. But even discomfort and ignorance are not good reasons for ignoring friends or acquaintances… >>>

Most of us know that too much stress can create problems, but did you know there is a kind of stress that is good for you? I know, hard to believe, isn't it? Let me explain what I mean.

All of us have comfort zones. Now a comfort zone is just a term for the physical or psychological area in which we feel comfortable and at ease. When we move away from the familiar to the new and different, we are moving out of our comfort zone.  

If the move is not something we choose to do or are not… >>>

How is your energy level? Do you sometimes wish you had more get-up-and-go? Today let's look at how high-energy people get that way. 

Why is it that some people seem to have a never-ending supply of energy? They get up feeling eager to get started and they radiate good spirits and high energy all day long. Did you ever stop by the vitamin counter at the drug store, wondering what you could take to get that kind of energy?  

Let me tell you what I think. Assuming you are in good health, your strength and energy will come from having… >>>

Managers who want quality from their workforce need to hold themselves to the same high standards. To borrow an old saying, "What's good for the goose, is good for the gander" - or it should be.

You see, in the quest for total quality and continuous improvement, many managers forget about the role that they themselves play in bringing these things about. They ignore the baggage they bring to work every day, but expect their employees to be totally focused on their jobs. Or they announce a new corporate ethic, but continue to behave as they always have because they… >>>

Today let's talk about self-blame. Unreasonable expectations and self-blame can really make our lives miserable. For example, how often do you hear yourself say something such as, "I left the car lights on - how could I be so stupid?" Or, "I really put my foot in it that time - I guess I will never learn."

Sound familiar? Self-blaming statements like these are commonplace for far too many of us. Now, there is nothing the matter with the first part of these statements - they are just simple facts. But it is the second part - the judgmental blast… >>>