Have you ever gone shopping to buy just one or two things and come home with a couple of bags full?  Let's talk about the pros and cons of making impulsive decisions.

Do you ever act on your impulses, or make spontaneous decisions to do things?  Most of us know that acting on impulse can have negative consequences, like when you are in the grocery store or investing large amounts of money. But did you know it could also be very positive?

Let me explain what I mean. You see, an impulse is nothing more than an urge to do… >>>

Everything in life can be used to learn and grow from. Negative things like depression can be used as springboards to a new outlook.  Now, no one seeks out painful experiences just because they want to be a better person, but the fact is that even difficult times have a bright side that can be used to our future benefit. 

Depression is one example. I will bet that each of you knows of someone who has been through some form of depression. As Dr. David Viscott points out in his book, "Emotionally Free," depression can be a clear sign that… >>>

When your younger children crave attention, do they throw a tantrum, misbehave or act out inappropriately? If so, maybe you can show them a better way. 

You know, children want many things that they don't usually ask for directly. In that way, they're no different from adults. Two things in particular that we all seem to need, but seldom come right out and ask for, are recognition and affection. 

Now, kids who get plenty of each from the start usually grow up to be happy, well adjusted, confident, and well behaved. Kids who don't get much of either, though, will… >>>

When your younger children crave attention, do they throw a tantrum, misbehave or act out inappropriately? If so, maybe you can show them a better way. 

You know, children want many things that they don't usually ask for directly. In that way, they're no different from adults. Two things in particular that we all seem to need, but seldom come right out and ask for, are recognition and affection. 

Now, kids who get plenty of each from the start usually grow up to be happy, well adjusted, confident, and well behaved. Kids who don't get much of either, though, will… >>>

When adversity strikes, whether it be loss of your job, an illness, a natural disaster or when you take a big hit that really knocks you off your feet for a while, how fast you get up again depends on a number of things such as: 

• How good your support network is,
• How solid your self-esteem is, 
• The extent to which you believe that you can control your own destiny, and
• Your experiences of overcoming adversity in the past. 

If you want to shorten the time it takes to get back on your feet, try this: 

• Ask yourself how it

… >>>

One of the most powerful forces in the world is under your complete control, and how you use it determines what happens to you in life. Let me explain what I mean.

If you are a parent, how many times have you told your kids to "Pay attention"? I'll bet you do it all the time, because you know it's important.  But I wonder if you really understand the power of our focused attention?

Perhaps your "to do" list has gotten too long, and you decide that today is the day to clean out that garage or closet. You start… >>>

What do you expect from your kids? How do you communicate your expectations to them? Today, let's talk about what's reasonable and what's not.

All parents expect certain things from their children. But expectations that are too high, too low, or never clearly expressed can cause trouble. Having expectations that are too high promotes failure rather than success, and leads to an enormous amount of stress for both you and your kids.

On the other hand, expectations that are too low can lead to failure, too, because they don't help your children to stretch their capacities and develop a sense… >>>

Most parents genuinely want their kids to do well in school, and there is a great deal that parents can do, to make school success more likely. Now, I know this may seem like an odd time to talk about our kids in school, since most school-age children in the Northern Hemisphere are on summer vacation right now, but bear with me. There is no better time to start preparing them for next school year, than right now.

First, and far above all else, find out how to build your child's self-esteem and work at it steadily. There is nothing… >>>

A while back, I was on a client visit, and one of our "tour guides" said something that sparked my interest. This organization is creating a new product line, and for the first time in their industry's history, they are approaching this new product with "a clean sheet of paper." In fact, they are approaching it from an entirely new perspective.

This one comment got me thinking: How many times have we gone about doing a job or a task the same way because "we always do it this way"? How many times, because of rushed time schedules or convenience,… >>>

If you are busier than you would like to be, but also less productive, then read on.

I have a question for you: How busy are you these days? Now, here's another question: How productive are you? As most of us know, the two just aren't the same. All too often, being busy may have nothing at all to do with the results we get and what we achieve.

We spend our days, often very long days, in a flurry of activity. But, when the day or week is over, we're disappointed at the level of our accomplishment. Our disappointment… >>>

No one wants to think of themselves as having a "big ego," but having a strong ego is definitely a good thing. Today I'll tell you what I mean by that.

How strong is your ego? Many people think that the term "ego" has something to do with being a braggart or totally self-interested, but they're wrong. Actually, psychologists tell us that the ego is that part of our personality that directs our activities, so we can get our needs met and survive. It's a normal and necessary part of who we are.

Having good ego strength means you perceive… >>>

What is a mentor? What is that mentors do? Can having a mentor help you succeed? Today we're going to be answering these questions.

These days, there are many sophisticated tools available to help those who want to be successful. But one of the most valuable assets anyone can have is also one of the oldest. I'm talking about a mentor - someone who can help you learn the ropes, find your way around obstacles, and chart a course that will get you where you want to go.

Just about every successful person I've ever met, whether they are in… >>>

The ability to reason and understand is important to our well-being. But so is our ability to feel emotions. Let's look at how the two fit together.

Intelligence is a wonderful thing. Our ability to reason, to make rational choices, and to look at things analytically has given humanity many great things. But when the mind is operating without the heart, when intellect rules without benefit of humility, we often end up in very deep trouble. In the 20th century alone, we saw the most cultured nation in Europe launch the Holocaust and the most creative scientists among us managed… >>>

When you have a complex problem to solve, how do you go about solving it? Today, I'll give you some information that might help you.

Sometimes, when we have complex or difficult problems to solve, our feelings of being under pressure cause us to push so hard for solutions that we wind up spinning our wheels. We study the problem from every possible angle, collect huge amounts of information, struggle hard and do lots of analysis. Still the answer evades us.

Some of this is because it's hard for us to tolerate feeling confused for very long. We want certainty,… >>>

Did you know that, in at least one way, you're at your best when your system is out of order?

Now by "Out of Order" I mean when your mental picture of how things should be is very different from how things actually are. Human beings are always striving for order, and when our mental picture of how things should be matches reality, we feel comfortable and in control. But what happens when they don't match? What happens when our mental picture of, say, the car we drive is thrown out of order by an accident? Or our picture of… >>>

How do you respond to personal affronts or insults? If you have high self-esteem, they probably don't bother you much, I'll tell you why.

Have you ever noticed that people with low self-esteem have a terrible time with anything they perceive as an insult? You see, beneath their façade of self-confidence, they're really not convinced of their own value or competence. So whenever they believe that someone has insulted or rejected them, they come unglued.

They fret and fume, they get angry, they spend a lot of time brooding about it, and sometimes they even seek retaliation or revenge. But… >>>

If you had a choice between love and fear, which would you choose? If you think the answer is obvious, what I have to say may surprise you.

If you were offered a choice between feeling and acting out of fear or out of love, which one would you pick? No question about it, most people don't even hesitate before they say, "Love!" But this is not a hypothetical question. It is a choice you and I are faced with every day of our lives. And all too often, whether consciously or not, we choose fear.

When you avoid success,… >>>

What makes people want to change? Notice, I didn't say "think they should change."

There are many things that make people think they should change, and all of them add up to pressure from outside themselves. It may be disapproval from a family member or friend. It may be social or cultural norms or even prohibition. It may be fear of punishment or humiliation.

But when pressure to change is coming from the outside world, our desire to change is probably going to disappear as soon as the pressure is removed. The results of our change efforts are not very… >>>

We've talked a lot about friendships and relationships these last few days. Yet, no friendship is as crucial to your self-esteem as the friendship you maintain with yourself.

There's no doubt about it, friendships are an important part of life. However, all your other friendships combined aren't as important as the one you have with yourself. Now, I say this primarily because every day of your life you send yourself thousands of messages that determine how you elevate your own worth.

The evaluation you make of your worth is what determines your level of self-esteem. Of course, the messages of… >>>

Yesterday, we talked about the need for "good friends." Today, let's back up a bit, and ask the questions: Do you decide whether to embark upon a relationship by your judgment of how long it may last?

We might as well get used to the fact that, with our increasing mobility, temporary relationships are here to stay. Now, temporary relationships should not be confused with long-term relationships that can be uncommitted. A short-term relationship can be committed, for there are other dimensions to commitment besides time.

Because temporary relationships have a beginning and an end, they have a special value.… >>>