Yesterday, we set out to create some meaningful goals for ourselves for 2012. In fact, I left you with the "homework assignment" of writing out goals for each area of your personal Balance Wheel. Don't worry (which is really negative goal-setting) if you didn't complete the assignment - goal-setting is a life-long "homework assignment." I am confident that by doing this, you are setting yourself on the path to a fun, enjoyable and fulfilling life.

So, now that you have all of your goals, written as if the future you want has already happened, what do you do next? The… >>>

You have your lists of wants, balanced in the different areas of your life. You have checked them against your values, and each supports the other. Now, how do we turn those "wants" into meaningful and achievable goals?

Today, take one of your Balance Wheel sections. One that is always important to me is Family. Traveling as much as I do, it would be very easy for me to lose contact with my children and grandchildren. So, one of my goals is to spend time with each of them, and for them to know that I am always available.

Now,… >>>

Now that you have your list of "wants" or "goals" in your different areas, it's time to check and see how they fit together.  Let's talk about goal-setting for a well-balanced life.

When you think about growing as a person, there are many distinct areas you can consider. Do you want to grow as a spouse or parent, in your social relationships, in your job or career? What about your physical and mental health, your intellectual pursuits, your spiritual life? You can also grow in the things you do for fun or in your involvement with your community.  

Have you… >>>

Did you enjoy your experience of "mind wandering"? I hope so. You see, by taking time to let your mind wander, unfettered by the "have-to's" of the day, you are engaging in a little mental relaxation that should leave you refreshed.

Today, let's do a little organization of those "wants" you discovered yesterday. One of the tools I like to use is what I call a "balance wheel." We've talked about this before, I am certain. Draw a circle, and then divide the circle into six or eight segments, so that you have what looks like pieces of a pie.… >>>

This week, I want to build upon the themes I have introduced since the New Year. I am going to walk you through a process of vision-setting and goal-setting that will stand you in good stead for the rest of your life. And when we are done, New Year's resolutions will seem like an old-fashioned parlor game.

Ask yourself the question, "Where am I going?" For most of us, that is a question upon which we spend far too little time. And when we do, it is usually because of some situation that has happened, forcing us to take a… >>>

We all know that people can be afraid of failure, but did you know that many people are afraid of success?

No one likes to fail. But some folks are so focused on the possibility of failure that they become over-anxious and unable to perform. Their fear of failure actually creates failure.

There are people who manage to sabotage their own efforts, often unconsciously, not because they are afraid of failure, but because they are afraid of success.

You see, we all carry around a mental picture of ourselves, and if success is not a part of that picture, we… >>>

Here are some things that don't exist: A bad day, a boring book, a demeaning job, and an ugly dress.

Now why do I say that there is no such thing as a bad day or an ugly dress? Shakespeare had this idea in mind when he said, "Nothing is good or bad, but thinking makes it so." You see, if the dress was truly ugly, every single person we asked would say, "Yes, that is ugly." But what are the chances of that happening?

And if the day was truly bad, then no one could possibly be having a… >>>

These last couple of days, I've been leading you to my initial thoughts for this New Year, those of comparisons. Comparing how far we've come, with how far we have yet to go.

Yesterday, I talked about how we shut down our drive, energy and creativity as we achieve our goals. It's natural for us to do this. And it's fine to take some time to celebrate our achievements, understanding that we are doing this by intent and not by neglect.

However, comparing our "today" selves with how we used to be virtually has the same effect as reaching a… >>>

Yesterday, we talked about the value of setting goals, about how a goal creates a gap that our minds are programmed to close - either forward or backward, depending upon how strong the picture is. This is why change can sometimes be difficult, because the new picture of where we want to be isn't as strong as the need to maintain current reality.

In order to move ahead, to reach goals that we have set for ourselves, we need to make the future picture of what we want more inviting, more attractive, more necessary than staying in our current reality.… >>>

With the ending of one year and the beginning of another, I am certain that you've noticed the avalanche of the year's "best" and "worst" lists. They are everywhere, from newspapers and magazines to television shows - even the financial pages. While it's fun to look back and reminisce, I'd like to talk a little bit about a more productive way of looking at where we are.

In these daily messages, I've talked about the need for purposefully setting goals for ourselves, in order to unlock the energy and creativity inside each of us. When we set a goal, we… >>>

Where are the limits of human potential? Where are the limits of your own personal potential? These are questions that have fascinated us for centuries, and we won't settle them here today. But, let's stretch our thinking a bit.

Imagine a one-legged man climbing a tall mountain. Imagine a blind sculptor. Imagine a deaf composer. All are flesh and blood, and have walked this Earth. Imagine huge, incredibly heavy machines flying through the air like birds, carrying people inside of them. Once unimaginable - now a commonplace thing. 

Think of ordinary men and women walking across red-hot coals without harm.… >>>

One of the things that I talk about a great deal in my work at The Pacific Institute is the power of affirmations.

You know, some communication systems, like those used by the armed forces, use the word "affirmative" instead of "yes." And that is what an affirmation is: saying "yes" to something. In a formal debate, the side that upholds the truth of the proposition is called the "affirmative side." So when you make an affirmation, you are saying, "Yes, I believe in the truth of this."

Affirmations, combined with visualizations or mental images, are a highly effective way… >>>

If you don't know where you are going, how will you know when you get there?

There are two very important things you have to know if you want to plan a journey. You have to know where you are, and you have to know exactly where you want to go. Once you know these two things, the rest becomes simple. You make a plan, which might be a map or a strategy, and you follow your plan.

Going through life without setting clear goals is a little like starting out on a trip with no idea where you intend… >>>

What is the difference between being yourself and being your "best" self?

Some time ago, a young woman came up to me and asked an important question. She said,

"Everyone is always telling me to just be myself," she said. "But I can be so many different 'me's.'  How do I know which self is the best way to be?"

You know, she is right. All of us have many possible selves. Some aspects of our personalities are active and obvious, and these aspects we call current reality, or who we are right now. But there are many other possibilities,… >>>

Today I am going to tell you an easy and reliable way to predict the future. Now I know, at least since last weekend, there have been a lot of people trying to predict the future - it is an election year in the States - but I have a method that is far more reliable than the pundits.

If you want to predict the future, if you want to know what is in store for you, take a look at your thoughts. What do you think about? What do you dwell on and picture? What do you expect and… >>>

OK, so we've now spent several days becoming aware of the negatives in our thoughts. Are you having trouble getting some of those negative thoughts to go away?

No one, not even the most optimistic person in the world, can think positively all the time. But successful people know how to get rid of their negative thoughts fast when they do appear.

Here's a great technique that originated with Matt Oechsli, a therapeutic hypnotist:

First, identify the thought that is bothering you. Most likely, it is a fear of something. Is it failure? Rejection? Incompetence? Could it be illness or… >>>

So, how did you do in your 24 hours of "no negative thinking?" I know, it was a looooong evening, but I'll bet you did well. Today, I want to continue talking about trying to break negative thinking addiction.

We have been talking about the fact that negative thinking can be a harmful addiction, and about how to raise our awareness of the amount of negative thinking we do by learning to pay attention without blaming ourselves.

Today, I want to take it one step further and talk about what you can do to break this destructive habit, once you… >>>

Do you know anyone who is addicted to negative thoughts? Perhaps it's someone closer than you thought.     

I am not an expert on addictions, but I've been told that an addiction is behavior that is usually harmful and that controls you, rather than the other way around. Can negative thinking be an addiction? You bet it can. Can it harm you? It sure can. How can you tell if your negative thoughts are out of control? Well, the first step is awareness.

Let's make today your Day of Awareness. As an experiment, here is something you can try, something I… >>>

Do you ever have trouble motivating other people? Maybe I can help you figure out why that happens.

Here's a tip that may help you change your tactics and experience greater success. The first thing you need to do is understand and accept that you can't motivate someone else. You see, people don't motivate other people.  

There is one thing that can motivate someone, and that is an idea. A book doesn't motivate, but the ideas in it certainly can. Money doesn't motivate either. It's the idea of what you can do with the money that is a motivating force… >>>

What can you do when you want to improve your marriage or close relationship, but your significant other seems to be content with the way things are?

Marriage or other close relationships offer us unique opportunities to grow.  Sometimes, though, conflict arises when partners in romantic relationships have different visions of what the relationship should be like and different ideas about the direction it should take.

If you think your close relationship could use some work but your partner doesn't, what do you do? Well, for starters, you don't start blaming them for disagreeing with you and don't assume that… >>>