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Peer Pressure

One of the biggest causes of stress and the subsequent attrition we face in our school comes from peer and family pressure. We have all to often seen parents that tell their sons or daughters "What makes you think you can do this, you never did anything else that you finished!". As they get closer to graduation, the pressure increases. We attribute much of this to jealousy.

I would be interested in any ideas that others may have as to how to assist the students through this difficult area.

This situation is particularly dangerous when the pressure being exerted by peers and family members reflects the inner concerns of the student. I have seen successful students find a way to fail just before graduation, thus avoiding escape from their familiar world.

It is important to keep re-enforcing the dream for the student through contact with people employed in their field of study. Career fairs can be a useful tool to educate the graduate and their support group about what lies ahead.

Many students do not receive the support they need to succeed from family and friends. Everyone in the institution plays a role in providing emotional support to the student. I think one thing that is very helpful is finding someone who can be a mentor/role model for a student who is at risk. Many times a student will feel driven to succeed if they believe someone in the institution has a high expectation in the student's abilities.

A student's perception of school commitment, and particularly the commitment of a person who they look up to, is very powerful, Anie. Do you assign a mentor/role model for each student? If so, how do you select them?

It is a terrible burden to feel you can never make a mistake.
We all live with other people's expectations of us. These are a reflection of them trying to understand us - and their predictions of what we'll think, do and feel
Family expectations often say more about the family member who holds them than the person they're directed at. They could be trying to live through their child- wanting to achieve what they felt they couldn't.

I agree that students somtimes are not supported by families and friends, I think jealousy may play a role. Many times someone outside the family is needed to be a mentor/role model, this gives them an example of a successful outcome for their work.

The situation you describe, Moszetta, does happen too often. Sometimes parents impose so much pressure that a student has to fail at the parent's plan before they can follow their own dream. What do you do when you encounter this situation?

Good point, Christine. What does your school do to connect students with mentors or role models?

I listen, and allow the student to vent; sometime we will cry together from their pain. After the tears, we begin building a strong foundation together brick by brick. I become a mirror to the student, a reflection of their dreams. I listen, and when the conversation is over I have also earned their trust. I begin to offer encouragement, and reassure their strengths and greatness.

Moszetta, you truly do give all of yourself to your students. Certainly, they must understand that you and your school are committed to their success. What type of courses do you offer? What are your completion rates?

Often, students do not get support at home for their academic goals because their family has little experience with academia--the students do not have role models on the home front; therefore, everyone in the institution is responsible for modeling succesful academic behaviors. Although we have academic advisors, etc., I have found that faculty can be the most powerful (informal) mentors for our student population.

How does the more formalized mentoring process work at other institutions? This is interesting to me.

Thanks,

Teri

Moszetta,

I think that you hit on a vital issue here--the role we need to play as listeners. Often by allowing the students to verbalize the problem they are experiencing and asking them questions, we are able to help walk them through this problem-solving process. It is difficult sometimes to resist simply solving the problem for them, but it is much more powerful for them when then can reach resolution on their own.

Additionally, when they are in the process of "venting," they often realize the root of the problem is not what they originally thought.

Good advice!

Teri

I am aware that some institutions are linking mentoring with academic advising, feeling that there are similarities in the traits needed for success. At my former school we used an on-line tool to build connections with students and open up lines of non-threatening, confidential communication. We used support staff for this relationship.

Anyone else have experience?

I agree that faculty can be helpful in this situation. I try to kepp my staff informed of issues that arise with students so they can help. The staff spends alot more one on one time with the students and also may have insight that can help the school express it's committment.

The biggest struggle I have faced is with students who don't have a support system at home.How do you continue to encourage a student when they go home to someone who doesn't believe in what they are doing? Any suggestions would be helpful.

Tammy, how do you keep everyone informed? Do you have a policy re: privacy?

Keeping the dream alive is a critical part of retention. It's not unusual for the people at home to be worried that the student will better themselves and leave the other family members behind. Misery loves company. It is important that the student connect with someone at the school that can help them overcome the negativity that they encounter at home. Support groups or special interest groups can also help the student by showing them that their problem isn't unique.

As I read your comment about how some students have little experience with academia, I thought, you are right on target. Many students have little or no background in their family to relate to what the learning process is all about. This does not start in a college environment but starts with the elementary through high school years.

I know this for a fact in that I am a full time substitute teacher during the day in several elementary and high schools both in the inter-city and suburb schools. I have taught different grade levels from 1-5 days. I always got the impression that the home life revolves around everything except the student. Many students come in with no homework done or an attitude of no one cares to help me outside of school so why try!

Sadly, I find it is true in my evening classes at the college, which apparently stems from a continuance of pre-secondary education. I have learned to be a role model for students of all ages and have changed their outlook on life. I have students tell me I don't understand or I can't do this, I tell them, I for one don't believe it. For instance, a student would say to me I can't multiply. This is where I step in and pull that student aside and show them they can. I might have to offer several different ways of doing it, but guess what, I will hit on one way that works and that student would look at me and say is that all there is to it? I'd reply that's it. The expression on that student's face of gratefulness in his eyes is overwhelming. As a teacher I needed to find that one way which makes sense to that student, and change that negative to a positive. As a faculty member I feel that I can be a very powerful (informal) role model. We all need to be that role model for our students from ages1 to 100.

I will say that most teachers in our public schools are dedicated, but in the last few years average class sizes have gone from 22 to 32 from elementary through high school. As public school teachers' jobs get tougher so will the jobs of the college instructors of today. Yes many students will be lacking in skills when they come to us as they enter their new college environment, but they come to us for second chances and we need to be ready. We can be that missing link they are looking for to be successful in the work place and society.

Joseph, thank you your dedication and commitment. You are the type of teacher that is so desperately needed throughout the educational spectrum.

I feel the same, however I stress to the students during orientation that they must choose their friends carefully while attending school. No negatives, a friend is someone that will be positive toward them and their goals. I also ask the students to sit down with their family and explain to them that while attending school, their life will be different and that help and support is needed at home. School is temporary, the rest of your life is forever.

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