Connecting with the student.
Creating a connection with your students isn't easy. Most people need lots of time to trust another person. My job is to recognize that a student is suffering and then to try and get them to open up. A lot of students won't do that. You have got to earn their trust.
Many of our students have heard "we care" from a lot of people, only to be disappointed when they reach out for help. How can an instructor overcome that negative experience?
I too have experienced this, but I am afraid I also am slower to pursue contact with some students due to having been "hustled" or taken advantage-of by some students in the past. It is a fine art to decide who is a scam artist, and who is in genuine need.
As instructors we have an obligation to set aside our beliefs and expectations and try to focus on the students. If we truly want to help, we want to help all wether real or not.
Dan, do you mean put aside our suspicions when approached by a student so we are open to hearing the problem? It seems to me that our beliefs and expectations are fundamental to the classroom experience.
Yes, that is what I mean. We should not pre judge who it is we think should or shouldnt need help. Only help who whoever we can in whatever way we can.
We have to show them that we do care. We need to care enough to earn their trust.
As instructors we must do several things reasonably well. One is to inspire. I attempt to do that by communicating some of the experiences I have had in massage therapy. Another is to demonstrate the relevance of the course material. I relate even the driest of academic subjects (that would be Kinesiology) to massage techniques that relieve pain and stiffness. The most intense experiences, the most dramatic statements ("you can remove pain from peoples bodies with your hands"), will not inspire everyone. but a lot of people "get it" this way. Finally, I use techniques to solve the students' own problems. This is the most powerful way I can demonstrate the usefullness of massage work.
I have found it relatively easy to create a connection with my students. It is based on mutual respect and a healthy level of humor. It has worked well with almost all of the students. The ones it doesn't work with are the ones who seem to have an issue connecting with anyone.
Many of my students are not used to having a support system. They have support possibly with family or spouse maybe children. I find a connection because I myself had a hard time trusting people when I was in school because I had alot of negative people in my life at that time. I found teachers that understood me and that could help me along the way. I give back by doing the same thing and I believe the connection with my students has been great.
When a student reaches out for help we as Instructors must demostrate an interest towards the student and get involved.
I agree, I find it easy to connect with most of my students. You can usually early on which students have underlying stressors and have difficulty in class. Most students respond well to respect and honesty
In dealing with students and people in general. You have to gain the trust of these individuals in order for them to ask your opinion, or even share a particular problem, our circumstance with you. A good way to encourage and develop trust is by being consistent and fair with all students who have issues or bring you problems to help them resolve.
One of the best ways of dealing with students is to find out the problem or question right away and then discuss the particular area briefly with the student and then formulate a resolution and then follow up at a later date as to their particular situation.
If a student comes to you with a problem, usually it's because they feel that you have the expertise and they feel comfortable enough with you to discuss the problem or the issue. This is a very important time in that we cannot feign trust or act as if we know the answer really don't. Sometimes you do not have the answer for the student Helen must refer them to another individual for follow-up. It's a good practice to check with the individual that they followed up with that, indeed, they did show up to follow
It's very interesting that many students do seek you out for a solution to a problem or situation which they've already thought about and have the answer yet, they are testing to see that is the most correct choice. It's very important than for an instructor to listen very closely to what the student is saying so that they can determine that the particular student has selected the right course of action or if not recommend the best possible alternative course of action for the student. It's usually best though to have the student develop their own answer to the question with helpful input from the faculty member
Comes very easily to me as an individual. One thing that I do know is that I take time. After each class, believe it or not to spend just a few minutes with a different student after each lecture, so that I get to learn a little bit more about him or her. The class gets used to this sort of policy, because I never deviate from it and in the process. I have opened communication channels as well as fielded questions which would have been lost or quite possibly saved a student, which we're about to lose
That is a good point Dan. We should treat every student equally. We only get to know them on the surface for only a short period of time so we need not judge. Offer help if they want or need it. Once they come for help, listen and see if they need further assistance from a trained professional or is it that they just need to vent a little bit about some things.
I pride myself on my relationships that I have with the students. I try my best to remain open and non-judgemental. I have many students that come to me with issues or just to talk and some are not even in my program!
I feel similar to you in regards to connecting with students. I feel that I've become a little skeptical of my students because I feel that I've been burned/hustled by some students in the past. I always try to go out of my way to help but my experience with other students has caused me to be a little guarded in my response. I hate that I feel this way but unfortunately I've had too many students that have fallen on the scam-artist side of the student-faculty spectrum.
I've been working on trying to take the students problems at face value and work with them to come up with solutions, but it is still a constant struggle.
