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The Instructor is everything to everyone!

The students really come to rely on the Instructor for advice, coaching, mentoring guidance, and so on. I think this is great! My only question is how does an Instructor balance the strict class objectives, and expectations with the human / compassion side? In other words, is it ethical to make acceptations for one student because of the awareness of an issue that is weighing on them, but not for another student? I personally try to weigh this in each instance, but never want to make acceptations “For the sake of retention alone”

Students do come to rely on the instructor for a lot, but it helps if staff and management are supporting the instructor. By working as a collective team, the instructor can concentrate on the objectives, still be caring, but other issuesd are resolved outside of class. This also helps with "exceptions".

Hi Suzanne,
Excellent point. The school needs to be operating as a team. It is just not the instructor that has the impact on whether the student stays and completes, it is the entire staff.
Gary

This is a tougher subject for me. It’s more of a balancing act. The instructor needs to be there to listen to the student even if the problem has nothing to do with the class. The problem may have to do with another class and at that point I might be very helpful to both the instructor of the current class and the student with a problem. When the student gets into more personal issues is when I have found I need to be more delicate. I always try to be encouraging but at the same time there are things we can’t get involved in. Then again, sometimes the student just needs somebody to take intrest in their problem and that by itself helps get to some resolution.

I find I have students coming to ask me for advice on problems I have never personally encountered.
They do not want to speak to a 'total stranger' about some things so do not 'trust' student advisors/counsellors.
Some of the things I have been asked about in the last year are, girlfriend/boyfriend issues, money problems, no where to live,(either lease expired or evicted from appartment) court appearances, pregnancy, abortion, etc.
Although I have studied psychology this is outside my 'training'. Student councilor has psychology degree but limited experience so tends to come up with 'by the book' answers and wants to refer people to other 'specialists' when student would prefer to keep things private. (I have, on several occaisions, been asked not to refer them to student services)
Obviously this creates stress for me, how does an instructor be both caring and distanced from this?

Hi Peter,
A common question that comes from instructors. You want to be of help and support but not sure where to draw the line when it comes to personal issues. The answer to this is not clear cut but I do not based upon experience of working with thousands of instructors throughout the world that each instructor has to find his/her comfort level in talking with students about such issues.
I would suggest that you determine where your comfort and experience level is and carry the discussion to that point. With minor issues I am comfort giving suggestions and recommendations to students but ALWAYS in the content of success within my class. I am clear with my students that I am not running a counseling center in my class. I am not trained to do such nor do I have time to do such and still remain on target with the content I have to deliver. I tell them that I will refer them to Student Services if I feel what they want to discuss is outside of my comfort and expertise range. Even though your students would prefer that you do not refer them since they are not comfortable with that you need to let them know you will do so. This will protect you legally and will reduce the times they come to you with such issues. You need to have the respect of your students and develop rapport with them but you cannot nor should you be expected to meet all of their personal issues needs in a professional career development course. Hope this information is of help to you.
Gary

Sometimes the classroom can be a place for the student to leave all outside distractions behind. There aren't many places left that we can't be reached by phone calls or unexpected visits. The classroom should provide this. All of a students problems will still be there in a few hours. I encourage them to give themselves class time for personal growth and nothing else.

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