Empathetic Listening
What are your best practices for empathic listening?
Mybest practice for empathic listening is to simply be present with the individual. I feel that by beeing present and aware I am able to truly listen with my eyes, ears and heart.
I maintain complete eye contact with the person I am speaking to, showing that I am listening with my ears, eyes and heart. I let them know that I understand how they are feeling and I am here to help them. This allows them to open up and share their story with me and feel secure that I will not judge them.
Erica, Excellent! What is the difference between sympathy and empathy?
Elizabeth Wheeler
Laura, No judgment is key, great awareness!
Elizabeth Wheeler
My best practice for empathetic listening is to give acknowledgements that show that I am listening. For example, I will say, "ok", or "mmm-hmm" very thoughtfully at appropriate intervals to indicate to a student that it is ok to go on, and I want to hear more. I also try not to interrupt, and when I feel I should interrupt because a conversation is not productive, I try to say, May I interrupt you for a second? I have some relevant information that might save you some time (and then I use reflective listening to make sure I understood what they were asking before I give them the information they needed).
Tina, It's great to make sure the student knows that you are listening, so repeating what you heard is really effective. I'm curious, what if you wrote down all the things the student was saying and after they were speaking provided them with the information? Many times a student will come up with their own solutions.
Dr. Jean Norris
That is a great idea! But I wasn't referring to solutions that the student could come up with on their own, I meant sometimes I gently interrupt if they don't know about a certain policy or procedure at our school that would answer their questions without hearing the long version of their question. But I see what you mean! ;)
My best practice for empathetic listening is to make the other person feel that I have enough time on my hand and I am in no rush. In addition to that I always keep myself calm and use soft voice, keeping eye contact and acknowledging what I hear is a practice I use while listening.
Excellent, Salma! It's so important to give the other person all the time they need and to maintain eye contact. Complete focus on the other person is essential in empathic listening.
Dr. Jean Norris
My best practices for empathic listening is to make sure I let them finish their thought without interruption. I try to gauge what kind of feedback they're looking for- if any at all. Sometimes the student just wants a sounding board, sometimes their looking for advice, or sometimes it just helps to be able to relate to their situation so they know they're not alone. Being able to determine exactly what type of response their looking for helps them know I'm empathetic.
Emily,
Excellent! It is about the student, after all. Sounds like you're dialed into empathic listening!
Elizabeth Wheeler
Salma, I do the same. When a student comes to confide something in me, I get a very rewarding feeling. I want the student to know that they matter. So, I get everything cleared off my desk and tell them they have my undivided attention because I want them to know what they have to say is important. If I get called, I tell whoever is on the phone that I have someone at my desk and I will call them back when finished. Students should always come first and know we are there for them.
Mybest practice for empathic listening is the same no judgment
Jose, It is important not to pass judgment. What are some other attributes you acquire that help to keep you empathetic?
Dr. Jean Norris
The best way to use empathic listening is when I'm paying attention using direct eye contact; I believe that in this way we can receive the message as we should
Exactly Ricardo! Listening with your eyes is a big part of empathic listening, as is listening with your ears and heart. It takes all three for true empathy! Thank you for your post!
Dr. Jean Norris
Trying to imagine yourself in the speakers situation. Your heart will be in it.
