Overcoming Resistance
When trying to persuade others, what are some specific ways that you overcome resistance to your ideas?
In order to diffuse resistance, I tend to do my best to reiterate the concerns and maybe even set forth additional arguments against my position, in order to demonstrate that I have a thorough understanding and appreciation for their resistance. Once people are convinced that you are not brushing their concerns aside, they tend to be more receptive to hearing out my position.
Great points. I have found another effective way is to allow the others space to articulate what exactly about this situation, proposal, etc is bothering them.
This helps both parties to get clear on where the concern & fears are so they can be addressed appropriately.
Ryan
I further question what tthere concerns are and them relate to them.
Good ideas. I recently came across the idea of using "gerunds" in these situations. Gerunds are those words ending with -ing. So asking others, "what are thinking about this?" or "what is concerning you about this?" Questions like this can help them articulate where their resistance is & then assist you in addressing their concerns.
Ryan
When adressing teams, or an individual, I expect to voice resistance, I too employ the tactic of voicing the concerns I feel will be presented before providing a counter-point. I also leverage having the team, or the individual, provide some solutions to concerns they raise. If they feel they are part of the decision process it can relieve some of their anxieties. Most of the resisitance I run in to is based upon fear of change. Many people react to change as my cat reacts to a piece of furniture being moved in my house; they get a wild eyed look on their face and all sense of reason becomes a fleeting memory. There have been times, with certain teams, I have had to come in strong and then back off to get meaninful dialog started; get their attention. But it is absolutely critical to know the team you are working with for this tactic to have a positive impact. Overall, partnering with people, instead of dictating to them, has produced the best outcomes for me.
Great points. I believe you are absolutely right regarding the fear of change being a huge reason for resistance. As I was doing some further reading regarding change recently I came across the statement that people do not truly fear change, but they fear loss. I found that very interesting & I believe true. We fear that this change means I lose something: prestige, salary, job, security, etc. Anyway, something to think about, I found it interesting.
Ryan
I try to show that I have experiences what they have, and that I understand their concerns. I then look for the positive aspects the change will have on them, and allow them to discover on their own what they will be.
I explain the history and reasoning for my proposal. I validate the employee by truly listening and mirroring what they say. Then follow through is easy.
This is a good strategy. One caution would be regarding trying to show you have the same experiences. The caution is that you might not have the exact same experience & they may view this as you dismissing them & their personal concerns.
Ryan
Yes and providing a chance for true dialogue & discussion is vital as well.
Ryan
How would you suggest overcoming that fear of loss?
Good question. I really don't think we can "overcome" it. Rather I think we must address this as a real fear, a legitimate fear & then deal with it from there. If you are diagnosed with cancer, you have a justifiable fear of dying. Yet you don't want to let that fear dominate you, but you want to seek treatment, fight with all you have, love your family more, do your bucket list, etc. You cannot choose whether you fear or not, but you can choose whether to let it dominate your life.
Ryan
I have found this to be true also, it often leads to insight on my part that allows me to try a different approach to persuading them. It makes it easier to address their concerns head on then trying to guess about what they may be thinking.
Kim,
it really is important to try & see the world from the others' viewpoint.
Ryan Meers, Ph.D.
I try to acknowledge the concerns of those who might be resistant, then do my best to communicate the benefits, both long and short term of the implementing the idea.
William E.,
acknowledging the concerns is a must as it shows that we are truly listening.
Ryan Meers, Ph.D.
I employ the tactic of anticipating the concerns that I think will be present. When I present the other side it becomes a Win-Win proposition. Allow the opposition to be part of the solution. No one likes change or new things, except true gifts! I prefer to be an ally and not an adversary. Ordering subordinates went out with the 50’s and 60’s…
