becoming personally involved with a students problems
Learned to send student to proper advisor for outside problems
Elizabeth,
That is a good practice as we want to be careful and make sure that students get the proper help.
Philip Campbell
This is a hard one, especially for female instructors with female students who tend to look at you as a mother figure at times. I have learned to use the statement "too much information" as a way of deflecting personal issues dialogue with students. I have a card with referral numbers on it to give to students experiencing problems. I am an educator, not a psychologist, nor a counselor.
Donna,
Good example of how to point a student in the right direction. We love to help students but they also then share too much with us. we need to make sure we keep that boundary between us.
Philip Campbell
It works with the whole "father figure" angle as well. In culinary education, there is an additional level of hero worship involved with the folks in the tall white hats. I try to be quick to use this to my advantage when things go beyond my realm. I usually say something along the lines of "I can show you how to cook an egg, but let's find someone else to help with that problem".
I wholeheartedly agree, being a fellow culinary educator. It is one thing to be able to engage and inspire in the classroom, but as instructors we need to be able to manage our own stress by not taking on the weight of all of our students' problems. Guidance is key, but knowing the fine line between being an empathetic instructor and one who gets "too involved" is a very fine line indeed!
At my school, we have a department which we use to serve students that have needs that go beyond the classroom. They can offer help with transportation, tutoring, childcare, etc. They cannot, however, lessen the sting of a death in the family, heal a broken heart or marriage, or help with students who are having specific difficulties that limit their classroom performance. Sometimes students' problems go beyond the teacher and others. It is ultimately up to the student to find ways to cope. Sometimes coping means dropping out until life has become easier to manage.
Such an interesting topic. I am assuming everyone on here is a post-secondary instructor? I have been a public education teacher for the last 12 years and now teaching in higher education. Not becoming personally involved is COMPLETELY opposite from what we are preached to do in public ed.
In fact, teachers are expected to go out of their way and find resources to help families. A referal to a school counselor or specialist would not be considered enough at all.
Seeings that our students are coming (and will continue to come) from the culture that their teachers are their own personal cheerleaders, support system, personal counselors, advocates, etc. there might be shocking change for them.
Educator encompasses both psychologist and counselor and I believe that if we deny that we really are committing a misdeed toward our students. We may not want it to be so, but unfortunately any job in management (classroom management) you must deal with the human factor.
Denise,
The human factor is one that can easily get lost. I do not think that is one that we do not want to deal with, I think that most times it is just the most difficult to deal with. We as professional can overcome that.
Philip Campbell
Denise, I completely agree. However we have to be careful not to allow the students to manipulate us to their own advantage. For example, when I first started teaching I was always listening to the student's problems whether it was financial stuggles or personal. I thought I was being helpful by lending an ear and giving advice. Then a student turned my help against me when it didn't work out in her favor and I ended up being reprimanded for interferring. Since then I make sure to only listen and offer advice when it comes to their school work and NOT anything personal. I send those problems to the Student Success Coordinator!
I am blessed/cursed with the personality that makes it easier for people to confide some of the most personal information with me. I take it in stride and refer students to the proper channels to best help them.
Carla,
It happens to the best of us. It is important that we all have those additional resources to give to students.
Philip Campbell
I listen and figure out the best advice to give to that student that is troubled ,with empathy. The best advice is relevant information. Reference to help agencies is the way to go ,then continue to ask the student if they are getting positive progress. We can't just drop the issue.
We have to let them know we care.
Dorothy,
Showing empathy for students is great. it shows that you are trying to associate with them and not just listen without intent.
Philip Campbell
Empathy to me means basically "walking in ones shoes". For the most part, people find me to be: a good listener, easy to talk to and nonjudgmental so I tend to get people coming to me with their problems and asking for advice. As I listen, some of the stories that I hear and situations that exist are beyond my comprehension. The resiliency of some of these students is remarkable.
My goal is to "point them in the right direction" so that they can get any help that they might need. Most of the situations that these people find themselves in, I would be unable to help...even if I did everything possible that I could. This being the case, while I empathize with them, they also know that the help that they need is beyond that which I can give. Even the small problems that I might be able to help with, usually are only a part of a bigger problem that is beyond my scope of knowledge or ability to help with.
Knowing the problem though, helps me to know what the student is experiencing and gives me insight into just what it is that may be affecting their academic progress.
