Lou Tice

Whether you are raising kids or trying to improve your own self-esteem, the relationship between who you are and what you do is important. Whether you are a parent, grandparent, or simply trying to build your own self-esteem, it is important to realize that we need to separate our sense of self-worth from our behavior.  

Imagine this scene: A three-year-old asks repeatedly, "Mama, do you love me?" Each time, Mom answers, "Of course I do." Then the child takes her hand and leads her to a broken flowerpot or shattered toy and looks at her questioningly.  

Here is a little… >>>

Did you know that you have a gift that no one else in the world possesses?  Maybe you have already discovered it.  I'm talking about your ability to live a life that expresses your unique personality and your individual talents through the work that you choose to do, the way you spend your free time and through your relationships.

Although it may seem hidden at first, when you search for your gift with an open mind and a free spirit, it will be there. Once you have found it, if you follow it with courage and persistence, it will reward… >>>

Do you know what a self-fulfilling prophecy is? Most people know that a self-fulfilling prophecy is an event that, because it is predicted and expected, is therefore more likely to happen, and even caused to happen.  

For example, according to Success magazine, two different groups of psychologists were once asked to observe the same child playing. One group was told beforehand that the child was emotionally disturbed. The other group was told that the child was a genius. When the psychologists were asked to report on their observations afterward, each group had found evidence to support their preconceived ideas.  

Now,… >>>

Nothing blocks change quite the way fear does, and when its power is greater than your power to push through it, fear is devastating. We can see evidence of this everyday in the news. However, in his book, "Getting Unstuck," Dr. Sidney Simon discusses ten ways fear blocks change, and today that information bears repeating.

Fear persuades you to do less than you are capable of doing. It triggers internal defense systems and fools you into thinking that you have perfectly good reasons not to change. Fear, particularly fear of making mistakes, causes indecisiveness and stops you from knowing what… >>>

Do you believe that having a purpose in life is important?  I do, and my experience has taught me that having a purpose contributes a great deal to the quality of our lives. Not only that, having a purpose can actually prolong your life.  

Several years ago, a study done by Judith Roden of Harvard followed two groups of patients in a convalescent home. Members of one group were asked to care for a potted plant during that time. Members of the other group had no such purpose. Those who were plant caretakers lived, on average, twice as long as… >>>

Do you ever talk to yourself out loud? Quite a few of people do. However, most of your self-talk is silent, and it's very powerful. You see, we talk to ourselves all the time. In fact, most of it happens in the form of thoughts, and it usually happens so fast, we don't even know it.

While you are reading this right now, you are talking to yourself three times as fast. When you stop reading, you speed up to about six times faster. These running thoughts, or "self-talk" as it is called, are very powerful. It is important that… >>>

Living in a society that operates from racist and sexist values is no laughing matter - and I mean that quite literally. Everybody likes to enjoy a good laugh, and everybody wants to feel that they are a part of a happy group of friends. But what about the times when the laugh seems to be at someone else's expense?

What do you do when you hear a friend tell a joke that plays on physical, racial, ethnic or sexual stereotypes? What do you do when you are chatting with a group of pals and someone makes a remark that… >>>

Today, let's talk about the most important relationship in your life - the one you have with yourself.

Think of someone you regard as a dear friend. If no such person exists in your life, dream one up. The time you spend with this person brings you a special pleasure, doesn't it? You tend to be loving, protective, and solicitous toward him or her, and you really have their best interests at heart, don't you? You really care.

Now, ask yourself, "Do I give myself the same kind of care and consideration?" On the basis of your self-treatment, many of… >>>

Most of us can handle physical pain, but when it comes to rejection or disapproval, it is often another story. Today, let's talk more about handling psychological pain.

Most of us deal pretty well with the physical lumps and bumps of life. Even though we dislike them, we bear our falls, illnesses, broken bones, surgeries and the like with relative aplomb. However, when it comes to psychological hurts, like disapproval or rejection, we often behave like frightened children, or we seal ourselves away in isolation.

Now, on an intellectual level, we all know we can't go through life without periodic… >>>

What would you like to avoid in your life?  Most of us try to avoid certain things like illness and injury, poverty, stress, depression and pain, just to name a few. 

Now, it makes sense to try to avoid these things as much as possible, but some people spend an enormous amount of time worrying about how to avoid them, and worrying about how to cope with them if they do happen to occur. Well, just by spending that much time worrying, they are pretty much eliminating the possibility of feeling happy.

They are also raising their stress level, thereby… >>>