Have you ever heard of the concept of "is-ness?" "Is-ness" is not a term that you are likely to see in a textbook, but it is an idea that has a profound effect on who we are and how we behave. Let me give you an example.

A person who believes that he or she "is" an optimist will naturally tend to look on the bright side as a day-in, day-out experience. But someone who simply feels optimistic right now may be very well feel pessimistic tomorrow. You see, an optimist "is" not who they are.

A person who believes he or she "is" a drug addict will tend to behave like an addict no matter what, and recovery may be very difficult. On the other hand, someone who thinks that they have developed a dependency on drugs doesn't have to alter their most central self-image in order to kick the habit.

We behave in ways that are consistent with the person we believe ourselves to be. That is "is-ness" in a nutshell. So you can see why it is important to know what you believe about yourself.

If there are things you'd like to change, first change how you think and talk about them.  Instead of saying, "I am in financial trouble," say, "I have some debts right now, but I am taking action to resolve them." Replace "I am a cancer victim," with "I've developed cancer, but I am basically healthy and strong."

Get the idea?  Your actions will follow your thoughts and words.