Often, as I teach the concepts of applied cognitive psychology, the reaction from some folks will be, "Lou, you spend a lot of time talking about 'me' instead of what each of us can do outside of ourselves. It's starting to sound a little selfish." This is true, to a point. Once more, I have dug into my message folder, to respond to this question and comment:
"The example that you gave seems to indicate that life is more worth living if you first change your attitude to a positive instead of hanging on to a negative, rebellious or resistive attitude. No worries; I got that one. But, in the beginning you stated that what makes life worth living can be summed up in a single word, 'you' Now, you lost me.
"In my line of work, I see the degradation of a 'me first' attitude. I agree that the only person you can change is 'you.' But, if one gets stuck in the 'you' or fixates with 'you' that would lead to self-centeredness, arrogance, elitism would it not? I see this all the time. Selfishness seems to be the start of greater, more serious social/societal issues. I would think that life is much more worth living, as you have indicated, if you could start by changing yourself to think more positively, to become a better person, in order to be of service to others. Am I missing something here?"
No, you are missing something, but I may have neglected to go that one step further. When I say that what makes life worth living is "you" or "me," what I am saying is that what we bring to living, for ourselves and those around us, is important. Each of us has special talents and skills, which when brought to bear on challenges faced by society in general, or a specific situation, makes life worth living. I do believe that it is in service to others that we truly express our worth.
But that sense of self-worth must come first, before we can be effective to the world around us. You see, if we don't feel worthy, we won't put ourselves in a position to help. We shy away. It's not about "me first" for no other reason. It's about making me the best I can be, then using all that I am to work for positive, effective change in the world around me. The same for all of us.
