Have you ever heard of "either/or" thinking? It's a dangerous, but common, mistake many of us have been conditioned to make.  

"Either/or" thinking, or black and white thinking as it is sometimes called, is basically just what it sounds like. Either/or thinkers don't see shades of gray. They want easy answers to difficult questions, so they see life in terms of winners and losers, good guys and bad guys, success or failure, right and wrong.

But they fail to realize that right and wrong often depend on time, place, culture and purpose, among other things. They also fail to understand that no one is all good, or all bad, and that success and failure necessarily depend on how you define them, just like winning and losing do. It is a one-dimensional way of looking at the world.

"Either/or" thinkers don't see the degrees of difference that stretch between most opposites, because if they did, it would require more complex thinking skills and a willingness to deal with subtle differences. Now, I mean it when I say they don't see these things. They build scotomas, or blind spots, to this information, because it threatens their either/or belief system. So, even if the information is true, it doesn't get through.

Do you ever catch yourself doing either/or thinking? Most of us do, from time to time, and it drastically limits our options. Deliberate self-awareness is essential - and a strong desire to keep your mind open to the full range of possibilities that will keep you from getting locked in a one-dimension world.