How do you know when something is good? The answer may not be as simple as it seems, so let's talk about it. It doesn't matter whether it's a work of art, a movie, a restaurant or a new brand of laundry soap - how do you decide that something is "good"?

Many people decide what's good by listening to so-called experts. They will praise a painting they care nothing about because it's hanging in a museum, or the artist's work was favorably reviewed by a fashionable art critic. They'll rave about a new restaurant because it's trendy and they'll go to see movies that have received good reviews or their friends have enjoyed.

Often their personal behavior is based on second-hand values too. They observe certain conventions of manners and they follow certain rules because some authority figure told them to do it, but they never looked further.

Living a life based on second hand values isn't living your own life at all. To really live, you must trust your own instincts and take the risk of stepping out of line now and then.

What I am really asking you to do is question your values to see how you got them and whether they are based on what someone else believes or on your own standards. In other words, take accountability for your experiences.

When you like something, think about the reasons. When you dislike something, do the same. Then, instead of saying something is "good," say that you like it, and explain why.